Friday, October 31, 2008
never torn between two men
and then aku ternampak....
...gambar ni, just a few days after i was born. aku bukan emo ke apa, but i actually cried after tgk gambar ni. to the left is arwah atok aku, tok brahim. he is my everything, really. aku cuma sempat hidup ngan dia 3 tahun aja, and then he left us. tapi amazingly, dengan kuasa tuhan, aku ingat most of the time spent with him. and only i can see the sweet memories playing on rewind in my head.
to the right, is my Abah, my grandad on mama's side. he is in new zealand sekarang tgh visiting his cicit. he has the most sabar with me and i love him endlessly. sekarang he is so weak due to old age. i haven't been spending time with him and i feel really guilty. i miss him badly....
between these 2 men, there is no such thing as who do i love more. i love them equally, and i love them more than anyone else.
"marlyne rindu sangat kat atok ngan abah"
please sedekah your Al-Fatihah to my Arwah Atok Ibrahim bin Ismail and doakan kesihatan my Abah, Haji Shaari Md Dom. Amin....
haaa... yang terselit kat bawah nyibuk stealing my limelight tu, tu la dia Pott @ my elder brother. kepoh seyy....
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
tak semenggah, tapi SEMENGGOH
we arrived about 20mins before the feeding time. so, we walked around and had a looksee of the newly furbished reserve. now, they even have a board that has the pictures of the orang utans. to me, they all look the same, but to those in the know, they are unique, each and every one of them. there is also a board that posts the D.O.Bs of the orang utans. the eldest there is 38 years old!! at 38, SEDUKU has already have a litter of grandchildren, sugoi!! and the youngest is turning 2 this december 2008.
the feeding time has finally come. i was already very ecstastic. we were briefed, were told to keep any food items safely in our beags or to leave them at the briefing station, to be very quiet, and to stay calm at all times (sounds like we were about to go through a landmine area!).
and then we waited......
....sekali tengok, SEEKOR aja menatang tu yang datang. tunggu sampai 40mins, takde pun yang lain nak turun,hampeh (-_-").
last2 yang paling banyak datang melantak makanan yang diberi tu are the squirrels. ni bukan orang utan watching, ni squirrel watching!! kalau setakat squirrel tu, kat garden umah aku ada banyak, selalu mencuri my sweet round peppers.
haiz...
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
SAtu aTOK (SATOK)
today, we went to the satok day market with hope to find the sago worms which is the larvae of the capricorn beetle. why am i looking for them? heheheh you wouldn't guess it!! :P
i want to try them as part of my culinary experience!! why else? yeah, i know i am crazy. but i beg to differ, i am more like, ADVENTUROUS.
anyway, there weren't any that were sold there today. we asked around and sad to say, they could only be found during the weekends.
so, what else to do? look for photo ops la. thank God the sceneries were something to look out for. and of course, we were worse than jakuns when we say the super duper fresh produce.
and also the prices of the produce, they are selling cheap!! but of course not all of the things there are cheap la, MOST of them. especially the produce that are taken from the jungles that are very abundant here.
we also found the famous ikan terubuk masin. i remembered eating this when i was younger. it was very delicious then. they ferment the fish with tonnes of salt, and to cook it, you'd have to wash off the salt and soak it in water for a while, then deep fry it or cook it with coconut milk. haiyaa... meleleh air liur, i tell you :P
then we walked some more after shopping for produce in the day market. mama wanted to try the must have MEE KOLOK. it looked to me like how'd they serve dried wantan mee. i didn't try it as i was still very full from breakfast. so, i looked around and something really caught my eyes....
....AIR ULAR?? what in God's name is that???!!?
mama asked the waitress what is the ingreds of that particular drink. is it really snake immersed in water and the essence is made into a drink or what. and the answer was, the drink is made using the powder that is extracted from drying a whole snake. like yewwwww.....Xp no. i am not gonna try that (actually i want, but i can't cause of my religion kan.)
so, tomorrow we moving nearer to the gunung santubong area. hopefully, i'll get hold of some of the sago worms. now, that'd be something really cool to blog about, eh?
thirt33n
27-10-08: my little sister has finally turned 13, but she is oftenly known as Nana.
weird no? want to know why??? haaa... lemme story mory you.
lidis, she very the manja one. super duper spoilt la same same like her elder sister (hey, not me arr), yah (this one at least her name amira arr, so ppl call her yah lorr). then arr, when she small small arr, she went to the babysitter same like yah. the babysitter have cucu arr, name farhana. and then, this farhana named herself 'nana' lorr. so, amal arr, after hearing 'nana', 'nana', she tot to herself: "walauweii!!! so nice arr the name, i want la lidis!!"
so arr, amal pon named herself as 'nana'. haiyaa.... since small arr, we told her: "little sister, your name arr, is amal. not nana. we call you amal ok"
amal: "dowan! dowan! i am nana"
haiyaa... since everyone loves her to bits arr, kenot argue la lidis. so, what to do, listen to her la. then we call her nana, until now ley...
sometimes arr, people in the family oso don't know her name amal leyy, because we call her nana maa... like my problem oso la, my name alia, people call me marlyne. sometimes, they ask, eh, alia? who is alia? haiyaa.... *sweat sweat*
anyway arr, yesterday arr, it is AMAL/NANA's 13th birthday. i hope she likes the pressies i got her and i hope, eh wrong, wrong, i KNOW she will become a beautiful, smart Lady one day....
I LOVE YOU nana...
meow.... (yeah, what a cliche...haiz...)
WHERE?: Kuching, Sarawak
WHY?: peminat kucing (nana) punya birthday present
WHEN?: birthday nana (27-10-08) to bila-bila kami suka la... hehehhe
HOW?: naik belon Air Asia tu le. tak kan mau dayung sampan. tak sampai de....
Monday, October 27, 2008
in the A-Yer
to put all our curiosity at rest, we decided to take a ride on the Air Asia carrier, which i am sure is the first low cost carrier that is available in Malaysia. from what i heard, it is a no fuss carrier which means everyone travels in the same class, you don't have to eat what they serve on air, if you are hungry, go buy on your own. there were also rumours that the price is sky high (of course la weii, you are in the air what?!?), but when we checked it out, it is rather feasible la cause judging that you can't make a pitstop anyway in the sky, whatever they serve you should cost that much. as much as rm5 for a pop of 250ml box of juice. of course, we didn't buy any, we brought it all from ground level, smart!!
this was our carrier. i like the REDness of it all. very the sesuai with me, no?
the mad dash: since you are not assigned to any seats prior, then you'll have to make a dash to get good seats. but it does not make any difference though because the seats are all of the same size only. but try not to seat near the emergency exit as we have been warned by the air hostess that the seats can't recline, so sweet of her. since our flight was not full, we could have had the whole row to ourselves, so no worries. we were practically seat hopping.
50 cents that make no sense
the lady quickly followed me into the loo. i was thinking that she's gonna stand there and wait on me. give me paper when i need, hand me the soap, spray some eu de toilett. but no, she came in with me to flush the toilet before i went in. WTF???
for 50cents, i don't actually know what i am paying for. look at the keep of the toilet. literally like CRAP!! mop not stored properly.....
Sunday, October 26, 2008
got DATE?
Yours truly,
The Date Escalade Team
Saturday, October 25, 2008
OLD world CHARMS in NEW wing
take nana from school and bring her for a surprise movie outing.
well, you need not guess what MOVIE that we chose for her. HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3!!! arrrgghhh... i seriously think that the movie is heavily influenced by hindustan movies la. even the talking becomes a singing scene and the singing, you need not imagine it. most of the time, the voices of the singers have undergone severe synthetizer modification. i am beginning to think that they use the throat mic that people who can't speak use (you know, the ones that make you sound like a robot), to sing.
anyway, it's a friday (as i said, this is POSTDATED!!). the friday lunch rush has a very ghostly effect that it'd drown you of your happiness as you are caught in the unbearable jam. yeah, we got caught in the jam, rushing here and there. and yeah, we got edgy, mainly because all of us (including ME!!) were dead hungry.
as we reached OU, mama started her 100m dash (this woman can really surprise you when she is hungry hehehe) and headed straight for CHARMS. in my head, i was like: CHARMS? what CHARMS? i haven't heard of this place.
and then it hit me: OH! this is CHARMS.....
i have passed it many times, but i never had the inclination to stop. i am attracted by the table with the swing bench setting, very BALIesque (got such word arr?). as we were looking for a table (why la she don't want to sit on the swing? huhuhuh.....), we passed a few patrons that were having this mini barbeque set on their table. it looked so cute and something different. i already wanted to order that.
the menu is sort of a THAI, PENANG thing fusion. it is very simple. the bbq set that i wanted to order comes with a plate of fried rice, which clearly i don't take. and since no one is having that, so, we did not order the mini bbq meal.
instead, we had other things that were on the menu that is equally if not nicer than the how the mini bbq set looked like.
SPICY GIZZIE (rm7.50): comes with a home-made hot chili dip. it is a rather generous serving as you can have it for 3 people. the crunchy texture and the rubbery of the gizzard just can't make you stop. comes to the table, piping hot! they should put up a caution sign.
SEAFOOD FRIED KUEY TEOW (rm13.90): the kuey teow is not too oily like the ones you get in most of the other resto of this genre. the infused sauces and spices blend very well together and when they say SEAFOOD, you can actually see the fresh prawns and cockles in there. alot!!
don't be shy asking for cut bird's eye chili. they will be more than pleased to serve you. if you are like us, they'll be running short of chilis pretty soon :P
this is definitely the best that was on the table today. nana has made a wise choice :D SEAFOOD YEE MEE (rm13.90). the sauce is very smooth and thick and the seafood serving is very generous. the yee mee is not refried like most of the hawkers do to keep its crunch.
CHARMS ROJAK (rm8.50) this is nice. i mean, nothing to shout about but it is simple and nice.
Friday, October 24, 2008
Recommended: Pen Torch
i recommend you this.
see, the ones that are sold in malaysia (spirit and energizer) are the only ones that you can get in the market. i have been trying to look for a good pentorch that emits white light instead of the yellow light.
see, sometimes you need a proper white light to demonstrate the presence of jaundice or the presence of anemia in a patient. usually this is done under adequate light (sunlight). but some problems may arise when the patient totally wants to be screened completely. hence you'll end up examining the patient in dinm lighting.
and most of the time, the spirit and energizer torches have such dim lighting, i can end up with a squint!!
thank God i found this.....
the light is bright enough and it gives off white light instead of the eyesore yellow light....
i can get it for rm27. with addition of rm5 for local post, rm7 for sabah and sarawak, rm9 for international.
please order in bulk of minimum 10 torches. because i have to travel to get it. not sold in malaysia.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
reach out to them
but today, she looked so frail, so fragile, so tiny on her hospital bed. her eldest daughter came all the way from selangor to be with her. when i looked at her daughter, she reminded me so much of my lovely aunt, ucu.
i had to call her. i missed her so much.
as i was on the phone with her catching up with the how many odd months that we have not been in touch, she mentioned about papa scheduled for surgery next week (30th october). i was surprised by the news. i knew that he is supposed to go for surgery, but exactly when, i wasn't sure. and then she told me that he is on medical leave right now due to the ongoing pain that he is experiencing. ok, i am worried.
then, not long after the phone call, mama SMSed me saying that uncle hisham's condition has worsen, he's brain is failing, apart from his heart that was the initial cause that he had sliped into a coma.
my mind was all over the place. maybe i am not that close to both of these men. but nevertheless, they are family. i am concerned, especially for papa.
i made a phone call to papa later in the evening to check on him, but he didn't pick up. ok, maybe i'll try again later. then, sometime around 7pm, i got an SMS from mama: uncle hisham has passed.
Innalillah hiwainna illahhi roji'un........
life is so fragile. you never know when it will be your turn to go. or worse of all, the turn of your loved ones. the last i say uncle hisham, he looked perfectly fine. i can't imagine that he had slipped into a coma and now, he will never again be with us. he is still young and full of life, but God loves him more. let us all let him go in peace and may God bless his soul... Amin.....
just about 10mins ago, papa returned my call, i am glad to hear from him. he sounded ok but he is suffering from pain due to his urinary tract problems. i want to be with him when he goes for the surgery, i want him to know that i am reaching out, forgetting the past, living the present, and looking forwards to the future. whatever it is, i want to build back the relationship that once crumbled along the way.
no matter what, family is family. they will always be there for you. reach out to them before they are gone and you ending up feeling guilty and sad that it is too late.
Al-Fatihah for my uncle Hisham Yasin....
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
taking the woman out of you
they say that the hair is a woman's crown. they say that the breasts are the woman's essentials. to me, as compared to the uterus, the other 2 mentioned above are almost meaningless. you can always grow hair, you can always augment or implant breasts, but i haven't heard of fake or implanted uterus, have you?
uterus is very important for child bearing. without one, the wish of having a child or another child of your own can never be fulfilled. i don't know how being pregnant feels like, but i am pretty sure for those who are expecting, it is something that is hardly describable.
i was in the OT the other day. went in when the surgery was taking place. at first i thought it was just another elective lower section caesarian section operation due to placenta previa (also known as low lying placenta after the 2nd trimester). after the baby was delivered, the doctor did not deliver the placenta, instead he started to remove the whole uterus. this procedure is called total abdominal hysterectomy (TAH).
at the same time, there was panic (not at the disco) around the baby's crib as the baby was starting to literally turn blue. it was not crying even after almost 2 minutes of the delivery. the nurse was paging for paeds doctor. and i am thinking: shouldn't a paeds be in the theater as well to anticipate this kind of situation? but the paeds was no where near. so, any other doctor in the theater was called to make the baby cry. and after much attempt, the baby started crying and it turned pink immediately, thank God.
meanwhile, the surgeons were having a tough time trying to remove the uterus. they also found out that the placenta has become placenta pancreta, where the minute vessels of the placenta has traversed the thickness of the uterus wall. the head surgeon was sweating, suddenly the blood pressure of the patient drop severely due to copious loss of blood, and the uterus is still far from being taken out.
after much prodding here and there in the abdominal cavity, the uterus is finally taken out from the mother. all the while throughout the surgery, i was thinking to myself: this woman will not be able to feel being pregnant ever again. this woman, will not be able to bear her own child anymore. the true "woman" in her has been taken out.
i guess the real definition of being a woman is when you are a mother. that is the test of it all when you have multiple responsibilities and the most important one is to care for yor child. so when you take the uterus out of a female, she has lost her chance of being a true woman.
Sunday, October 19, 2008
she'll be making her debut soon
it also has been a looooong time since i last went to CS. i don't know why, but i felt rather tensed therefore i decided to go for some retail therapy. i knew i had something in mind, alot of things actually. i didn't put anything on paper,everything were in my head. but as soon as i was there, i forgot what i wanted to get!! curse you jo-ee, your forgetfulness is so contagious!!!!
so, ok fine, i wanted something, i ended up getting something else. and then i met her, my new soon to be best friend (i hope). she's really lovely. she was with her friends when a mutual person introduced us.
anywho.... i'll be introducing her to you soon.... *snicker snicker* wait haa!!!
Friday, October 17, 2008
smelly no more?
the answer is: ANDROSTADIENONE (gawsh!! tounge twister!!)
lemme skim the info down to its bare essentials just so that we can grasp what in the world is this thing, eh?
Androstadienone is found in sweat, auxiliary hair, blood and semen. It is a common ingredient used in the manufacture of perfumes and colognes (haa.... no wonder la i am attracted to some male pour homme, if it were used by the right people). this is a chemosignal substance that causes the visual area of the women's brains to be more active and more alert, hence more attracted to the said male. androstadienone can be considered as the male pheromone.
so, next time, when you see a sweaty uber hot male, you choose, take a good whiff or runaway.
ermm.... i'll pass.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
recommended: HISTOLOGY
very compact and the diagrams are schematic, therefore it is easier for you to draw the slides when you are asked to. each diagram comes with a keypoint box so that you know what you are looking for and what you are looking at.
they also have gross diagrams of the parts that you are looking at under the microscope.
there are notes to read up on. the text is very straight forward and easy to understand.
contact me if you are interested. you know where to find me ;)
funny finds
people can be really funny, or just plain stupid at times. i think they are funny.
saper tu KAK SANDRA? apa ke hebatnya dia tu sampai keropok ni dinamakan sempena nama dia? tapi seriously, rasa keropok ni macam haram. nama je stylo.... haishh.....
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
when they think it is love...
this time round, we have only 4 weeks to be here, therefore i am gonna make the best out of it.
the first 2 weeks i am posted in the gynae ward where most of the patients are in the age where child bearing is not advisable. either that, they are of the age where gynaecological problems might occur where there is a strong family history of the similar cases. some of my mates are in the obstetrics ward, where most of the patients are still very young and still very pregnant. when i say 'young', i am most shocked to get the news that one of the patient is actually currently sitting for her PMR exam in the ward under the watch of an invigilator.
yes, she is 15, and yes she is very pregnant.
she got pregnant before she got married. and yes, she is married, she has to, actually. since she is still not at the age where marriage is legal in this country, she is married off by her father in the traditional way in the temple. when she is at the right age, i guess they will register her as married under the law. i keep on thinking, why did she put herself in this situation? she has all her life to look forward to. did she think it was love? was she sure about what she was doing?
and then, there is another girl, a 16 year old. she is rather big sized. she came in because she was constantly vomitting and her parents were dead worried about her. they couldn't detect what was wrong with her so they did the urine pregnancy test..... positive..... imagine the shock that her parents got when they knew that this princess of theirs is currently pregnant. she is not sure of her lst menstrual period, therefore the docs cannot estimate her delivery date. she has to go for ultrasound scanning to see the gestational age of her pregnancy. what drove her to do it? love perhaps? or lust?
if you really want to do it, don't la get pregnant at least. you are still young. pregnancy is a HUGE responsibility.
think la sikit....haiz...
hapdate: according to the clerking that was done, the 15 year old girl was told by her parents to abort the pregnancy but she wants to keep it. now she is in her 30th week, about 2 months more before she becomes a mother. her bf who had become her husband is 20 years old. the father has lodged a police report to state that she is married and will be legally registered as soon as she reached the legal age. her husband has not done any police report yet to confirm that they are married under the traditional way.
dress c.o.d.e.
so now, if you have read my entry on "when in Rome....", you'd realize that i have become more subtle and i tend to blend in. evidence that i have blend in well was when one of the bigshots of the Merbok district can't even pick me out from a crowd of people!! usually, they can do that in a blink of an eye. finally!!
so yesterday, we headed to campus straight from hospital as we had a long hospital session and there was no time to head back home and change or freshen up. i was still in my hospital wear i.e. semi-professional as i entered the classroom. some of my mates had the liberty to go back and change first. therefore, some of them came with casual clothes i.e. pedalpusher jeans, baby T, t-shirts, no tie etc....
the doc that took us was a local gentleman. naturally, one would think that he wouldn't mind much about how we dress so long that we attended the lectures. i mean, he was careless about it before, so what will make him tick if someone come dressed not according to the dresscode, eh?
we were in shock.
She came in looking like she just got back from shopping in the pasar malam, very very casual. doc VM signalled for her to go to him, he said something and she made the move to leave the room. and suddenly, he burst out! he was going on and on about the way a medic student is supposed to dress. he chased out those that were already in their Ts and jeans, those that didn't have their ties on, those that were wearing too tight for comfort.
everyone was just quiet when he started the lecture with how to dress appropriately and he said that we are not to even show our faces in the campus or hospital if we can't make an effort to dress properly.
as for me, the first words that came out of my mouth once he was done were: "for once, it is not me! thank God!"
Monday, October 13, 2008
we are not trashy, we RECYCLE.
The 25th of September 2008 has marked a significant day that hopefully will change the mindsets and attitudes of the population, one student at a time, towards recycling. Day in and day out we see many resources being wasted without a second’s thought of how we can reuse it. For those who are in the know, recycling is something that must be started, sooner or later, which is better than never.
Therefore, the noble TzuChings from the AIMST Tzu Chi’s student chapter has decided to hold a recycling campaign. The aim of the campaign was to update students and members of faculty on the state of the current environment and also educate them about how to recycle the proper way i.e. what items are recyclable, what grade of plastics that are available, the different usages of aluminum cans etc.
The crowd that turned up was not as big as expected, a little less than 50 people were there. But the program continued on under the good support of Dr. Kay. No matter how small the crowd is, the show must go on, she says. But it was not a disappointment as our honorable VC, Prof. Geoffrey Smith, has spared some of his time to drop by to our humble campaign. Although he did not manage to join us for the whole session, yet, he is in full support of our campaign and he says that the university is also delighted to make this campaign as an ongoing program. That is something we treasured most, knowing that our effort has made a progress even in its early stages.
The program started off with an update of the state of the current environment, which was followed by games on recycling, and a question and answer session soon after that. It was great fun to see how the crowd enjoyed themselves and how they are amazed at the things that they did not know about recycling. Some of the seniors of the Tzu Chi Association were there too, to support the campaign.
Towards the end, there was a sharing session where the students, Tzu Chi members, and our advisor Dr. Kay sat down in groups to chat and get to know each other better apart from discussing their experiences on recycling. Everyone was happy when they left the room and we were glad that we could pass the message of the importance of recycling.
It is amazing on how little things like this could make a world of difference. Recycling is not something that we could choose whether to do it or not. It is our responsibility.
Sunday, October 12, 2008
puas hati
so, sementara tgh tengok2 tu, ternampak la pulak paku pakis and sharon asked if i knew how to cook that. yeah, mmg le aku tau, secara theory nya. practical, aku tak pasti lagi. dia tanya la if i can cook it for her, then aku ni kan mana leh cakap yang aku tak tere buat sth kan. so, aku cakap je la yang i will cook for her.
sekali tengok, i have invited them over for dinner. gawsh!! what shit have i put myself into??!?!
aku ngan jo-33 pun plan la menu.
-paku pakis masak lemak
-sambal kerang + lokam
-salad jantung pisang.
-nasi putih
-honey lime drink
pukul 1630 hari ahad, eletrik takde.... haaaa!!!! nak buat macam mana ni? dinner kul 1930!!
takpe... takpe... lepak. kalau pukul 1800 takde juga, makan luar la gamaknya.
but at 1740 lidat, the api datang balik. so start le memasak. aku ada la kalut juga sebab hidup bujang ni kan, banyak le alat yang kurang. but we pulled thru. apa yang ada, kita gunakan. mana yang kurang, kita tambahkan. mana yang tak sedap, kita modify. setelah siap semua, aku siap solat dulu lagi nak tunggu guests datang. hati berdebar2 sebab sambal aku terlebih pedas, kuah lemak aku tak cukup pekat, according to jo-ee, salad aku masin. arrrgghhh!!! tension!!!
sekali tengok, lauk yang penuh dihidang atas meja tu, makin lama makin kurang. nasik yang ditanak pun habis. kira takde baki la. kecuali kuah lemak tu tinggal kuah aja la sebab semua health conscious kan. aku masak aja, makan tak la... kekekek... pelik la aku ni kan.
aku rasa puas hati la derang cakap aku masak sedap. padahal hati ni libang libu sebab risau tak habis apa yang aku masak tu kan. malam ni aku nyer dinner theme is malay food. kononnya esok jo-ee punya turn, chinese style. kekekekek... tak tahu la jadi ke tak :P
yang penting nya, aku punya guests balik ngan perut yang kenyang and hati yang happy and they hope to be invited over more often for this kind of dinner. aku punya happy la dengar macam ni... tak terkira dowh! dah la steven ngan angela suka kat aku punya salad jantung pisang yang langsung tak guna santan tu. jo-ee lak suka aku nyer sambal. yinying and sharon suka aku nyer masak lemak.
aku?
aku suka tengok orang makan benda yang aku masak.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
when in Rome....
Roman does. possible no? yes, it does sound rather contradicting, but believe me, it works!! well, so far that i have seen that is.
see, i have been this type of person where i simply don't follow, i LEAD (or at least i believe i do). i hate being the same as everyone else. i want to be different. and being different does come with a price. i have been shunned (ok, i know, this is such an exagerration. so kill me already), i have been the talk of the town, have been the center of attention, you name it. it is not like i am begging for it, but according to some people, i am actually asking for it without me realizing.
at first i was angry that all those things were happening to me. i was wondering what i did wrong that people just LOVEd to pick on me. is it because i am the only MALAY? is it because i am not the typical MALAY? is it because they cannot accept the way i think? sadly, some parts of this are true. i am living up north and they have a totally different mindset here. they cannot accept something different. everything has to be the same, everything has to coincide with their lives, they won't change one single bit, even if it was for the better. but not all of them are like this. MOST of them are. i don't blame them. they have been living and thinking like this for ages, centuries even! i can't be gallavanting here and expect them to change their minds overnight, can i?
no, i can't.
so, what am i to do? i learned from my mistake and i became more subtle. i learned to blend in, but not be one of them. i dress as according to their requirements, i speak only what they could accept and understand. and thank God, i am still me. no matter how much i try to be a chameleon in their lives, i still am not able to do so. i still stand out, they still know the one (not really) and only ALIA. but this time round, they know me for much better reasons. really, thank God....
yes, although i am blendng in somehow, i still retain my identity. i don't change because people want me to, i change because it is a good thing to do. i don't want to be arrogant and say, "i don't care what people say about me, they are not paying for my living and i do not owe them a single cent". i used to say that alot. i used to apply that alot. but that was me before. yes, i come around with a sincere heart to do things but i also have to think that if i openly invite 'fitnah', then 'fitnah' shall come to me. i understand now that people advise me because they care. it may take me some time to install that information in my thick skull, somehow, someday, it does seep through.
take for example BMW (a new friend from the UK), he is so laidback and simple. he accepted the way of living of the villagers and infact he is blending in well with them. he eats with his hands, he wears sarong when he is asked to (because it is not proper to wear shorts in the village), he wears a baju melayu even under the hot scorching sun. that is something to be of example. if he, a total stranger can do all that to blend in, why must it be hard for me eh?
i must respect the way others live in order for them to respect and take me seriously.
when in Rome, thank God that you are there!! *peace*
no arrogance needed.
Friday, October 10, 2008
under my umbrella
it made me wonder: is THAT umbrella really worth it for you to make such great search for it??
go and get a new one la. rather than spending money doing all this printing and paper wastage, use the money to get a bigger and better umbrella.
come to think of it, i should go and get one new one for myself since the last that i had, has one of its hinges broken.
at least i don't waste my time printing announcement looking for an mbrella doctor eh?