Thursday, April 24, 2008

attempted and succeeded mass suicide

22nd April, 2008: C2R, after a heavy downpour that occured late last night that prolonged into this morning, a congregation of light worshippers has decided to commit mass suicide. it was rumoured initially that the occupants of C2R have to be careful of this type of incident to happen, especially now, during the wet season of the northern states.





these flying comrades was a small group of staunch light worshippers that have decided to end their lives due to the lack of anything better to do. they invaded the common area of C2R with the intial pretence to worship their ultimate Idol, the LAMPU KALIMANTANG. according to an unknown and unconfirmed (highly made up) report, LAMPU KALIMANTANG did not provide the light worshippers with adequate illumination for their nightly randevous of agressive mating and partner-hopping. this has lead to the decrease in population growth over the last few months. the head of this group of light worshippers, AkuMenatangBodo, has even sacrificed his whole family in this mass suicide to prove to LAMPU KALIMANTANG that if there are no adequate light, let them all extinct (but still, melambak2 kat sini... haiiisshhhh).



AkuMenatangBodo, his wife, MenatangTerbangDiLampu, and their only son, Flicker.



followers of AkuMenatangBodo that have vowed their lives to his words.

at about 0530 this morning, 1 of the inhabitants of C2R, who cannot stand the site of the mass suicide (only Red, really. the rest, if they saw this, they will just happily step over them as if they are a part of the flooring), has taken the GOD-sent tool, PENYAPU JERAMI, and did a mass burial (sapu ke luar pintu apartment) in hounour of the novel effort of these light worshippers to go on strike.

currently, there are words saying that other groups of junior (smaller sized) light worshippers are planning to do the same. but they will have to find another location as the windows to C2R are shut close because we cannot tahan these blahdy flying MFs.

go die tempat lain la. menyusahkan aku nak sapu je. ada nyawa, tak bersyukur....haaaiiisshhh....

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

under the microscope

.....that is where i have been placed (other than being under pressure as well). if any of you have read my post "Professionalism redefined", you would remember that i have mentioned there regarding mr. pelik "passing" a warning to me through my groupmates. he even said that he will be posting a spy in the ward to monitor the way i dress to the hospital.

seriously, i thought that this was a JOKE. i mean, where would he find time to actually recruit a person to spy on me. maybe he thought that by putting a threat like this, i'd be afraid. it does not affect me, really.

the most retarded thing that i just found out today while i was on call is that, there IS actually a SPY especially for me. and the spy is non other than the HO that is under him!!


waaahhhh!!! i am THAT significant to him that he actually has a REAL spy for me? i really can't believe that he thinks of me so much that he has time to go through all these troubles. gawshhh... now i feel so damn IMPORTANT......not......


but seriously, does a specialist, who is holding a job position that i hope to be in one day, really act like this? i don't think the kids nowadays are down to this level of thinking.

although, the HO is very simple. he doesn't even care to monitor me or scan me up and down. he's so into his work and we'll be trailing after him to join in his on call rounds. like a normal cat, he was just curious to know who is this FAMOUS girl that he was supposed to spy on. i could see that he was excited to finally know who is ALIA (gaawwwssshhhh.... mr. pelik KNOWS my name! uisssshhhh..... melampaui batas dah ni!).


whatever la. if mr. pelik wants to be like an idiot, let him be. it IS his right.



next time when mr. pelik is picking out every single detail about me just to make sure that my life is a living hell, i hope he sees this.

ENGLISH V 2.0

my reader, mr. djambu, came over to my blog and has tagged me for the duration of 4 days. i did not notice the tag, until it was apparent when he told me.

these are the management of the tag.

(ceyyy... macam case persentation kat ward jek :P)


-Name 4 Things That Need To Be Invented:
1) doraemon bread: where you just place the fat-free, 0-calorie, filling, delicious piece of bread over the pages where you could find informations of the materials that you need to know (webpages or paper pages), then, the info is transferred to the bread, then, you eat the bread and the info are permanently in your head. no more reading required and you need not worry about your waistline! PERFECT!

2) a portal transporter (pintu suka hati mak ko): that could transport you to anywhere and anytime you want. good for emergency situations. as for me, good for going home ALL THE TIME!

3) hologram communicator: this deviced could be used when you want to talk "face-to-face" with the other person. break-ups, marriage proposals, divorces, anything that is personal, can be done over the communication space, and yet, you don't have to be there physically. this could avoid further embarassments for people who are shy or can't except rejection. violence could also be avoided in case of bad news (ie break-ups).

4) personal currency machine: so that you can use the money la, what else!



-Name 4 Things That Should Never Have Been Invented:
1) weapons (i am against violence!)
2) plastic (i can't stand the pollution anymore. how severe does the pollution need to be for you to realize?!?!)
3) weighing machine
4) power (ppl can just loose themselves when they are given even the lowest position...)


-Name 3 Things I do not know about you:
1) i am not THAT emotionless!! i DO have feelings.
2) i suffer from PANIC ATTACKS when the situation is not to my liking (ie turbulance)
3) i am a very flatulent person (kakakakkakak)


-Name 5 Snacks you enjoy:
1) FRUITSSSSSSS!!!!
2) baked, low-fat crackers
3) roasted soy beans (any beans actually, that is why i am flatulent :P)
4) steamboat (kira snacks tak?? kira la... kira la...)
5) any form of low-fat, sugar-free CEREALS!!


now, i wanna tag...hmmmm.....abeming....

Monday, April 21, 2008

No, your eyes DID NOT deceive you.

haaa.... see the SWEAT (i SWEAR that is MY SWEAT!! just cause i took the pic in the loo, does not mean that i splashed myseld with water right before the pic was taken. i SWEAT all that out in the gym today by doing my NORDIC -jo-ee babes, i know kau rindu nak naik menatang ni kan? hehehehe -)?? believe it, cause it is true. i work out this much when i feel like (that means, ONCE in a year :P). anyway, this post is for a certain reader who says that he didn't see my muscles making their debut (finally la my mm nak tumbuh (grow) dan membesar (develope) hehehe). all the effort today, is so that my muscle bulk up today. heheheh


NOW, do you SEE? got or not the muscle?? (aiyaahhhh.... if not convinced oso, at least gimme some face and buat2 nampak la. nak kena heart attack dah red tadi gi work out kat gym....-_-" )
but seriously, ada kan?? kan??

Saturday, April 19, 2008

case of the missing A

i woke up at an unGodly hour today which was at 0400 hours. this was intended, althought actually, i had set the alarm at 0445 hours. i wanted to fast today because the days that i didn't fast way before this, was long overdue for me to replace them. so, i picked today. i waited till about 0445 hours to make my cereal drink (i am a habitual eater. i can eat this cereal drink 3 times a day and i won't complain one bit!). after having my meal, i did a spot of studying (yeah, i actually did!!) and of course surfing (most of the time) till about 0713hours when i decided to sleep back cause i am DEPRIVED of good sleep (simply because i am suffering from insomnia).

this is how a person with insonia sleeps. eyes wide shut (such an irony!)

*sleep sleep sleep*

*drool....(maybe i have VII cranial nerve palsy?)*

i woke up again at 0930 hours but i had to force myself back to sleep because i want to really rest today. finally, at 1130 hours, i woke up. waaahhhhh.... so damn long one i slept! i sooo damn proud of myself leyy. i mean, i can hardly sleep a good 4 hour in a stretch. so, to achieve such heavenly long sleep, i feel like a champ! (haiiisshhh... to sleep oso so hard for me....). as i woke up, the temperature has already long risen before me. so damn hot la!!! habis hangit dah satu badan! immediately, i went to have my brunch shower. after the shower, just out of impulse, i went to the pantry area to put away some dirty dishes. suddenly.... i noticed something. something really weird.....

i "borrowed" someone's apple just for the purpose of taking picture....

*snap snap snap*

*uissshhhhh aku gigit juga karang apple ni.....*

the plastic that was holding my apple that was in the vegie drawer in the fridge, was on the pantry top and it was EMPTY! i did some lookey lookey and i saw that the core was already in the makeshift wastebasket (i did not dig in it ok. it wasn't even full, so i could definitely see the core in there)!!. waaahhhh!!! so berapi already my hati. then, i wrote a note:

buat penat tulis je. bukannya ada siapa nak ngaku.

....and pasted it on the fridge door (yeah, we do not have magnets). i waited.... and waited... and blahdy waited. NOONE.....NOONE (sing to the tune of Alicia Keys' hit single "noone") came to own up! aiisshhh... what the hell is this?? come on la. i won't be angry, i will just be outraged!!! aiiyaaa... no la. i just want you to own up la. i mean, i have WALKED under the hot scorching sun to get this particular APPLE, so, if you want to take oso, ask me first la. currently, in this house, there are only 5 of us. cut me out, there are 4 of them. cut one out cause i asked her, who ate my apple, and she denied it was her. and then there were 3. i have in mind this person who is staying next door. i haven't had the chance to confront her. but if it was her, and she was in her right mind, she would have told me kan? still waiting.......

because i so damn geram (and actually quite thirsty because of the heat), i decided to break fast. i drank like as if i am diabetic (selisih malaikat 44),or in my case, badak air. then, off again for another session of mindless studying. did the blahdy laundry that was piling up and also took out the recycle items that i sorted out yesterday. at about 1700 hours, i was SLEEPY again!!! aiiiyaahhh?? how come?? i concluded that it was because i am so damn pissed about my apple la. all the emotions (yes, i am emo. i may not look the part) that i was going thru, drained me out......

i tot i wanted to nap for 15mins. sekali tgk, 45 mins!! and i was supposed to go to gym. the lazy part of me was overwhelming that i decided not to go to gym. i was taking time, wasting every bit of it to let it pass. but then, the conscious part of me forced me to go. without even thinking twice, i let her dominate me. got ready, got set, WENT!

spent about an hour in the gym and was happy (despite having my bad knee) that i burnt a copious amount of calorie (tapi, macam tak kurus2 je lagi. kenapa la ni?). i didn't do weights today as i was giving face to the lazy me (she needs some attention too). but nvm, there is still tomorrow, aite? i'll do weights tomorrow, PROMISE.

just because of my APPLE, i became disorganized and dislodged from the plans that i had. see, what this situation has made out of me?

moral: do not take my fruits away from me, it'll make me NUTS!

HE can't handle ME



Yeah, I heard about some STUDENT that you beat pretty bad and got in the RUMOURS
Sure, you own a cool JOB and I hear you get far with every NURSES
Yeah, I saw you on the WALL, your WORK is the $H!T but you're outrageous
Sure, I see you’re living' large with your crib and your cars and that's just great, but

Let me tell you how it'd be
You won't get with this you see
Cuz you can't handle me

Yeah, you make your big move and I see
you’re not used to being rejected
Sure, you making that call to your BITCH
and I’m sure you're well connected
Yeah, judging from that line you just passed
you are well known and FEARED
Sure, would me and my girls come participate in something you FORCED

Oohh..
Let me tell you how it'd be
You won't get with this you see
Cuz you can't handle me
It's a simple fact that you can’t seem to handle me
Don’t matter how you act with them
you can’t handle me
I don't really feel you got my back
Cuz you’re a selfish narcissistic psycho Freaking bootlicking Nazi creep and
You can’t handle me

Yeah, I think you’re kinda CRAZY
when you try and act like you ain’t looking
Sure, I think you’re kinda FAT and your ride – Sure is off the hook and
Yeah, bet you could take my mind off of STUDIES for some time and BRING me DOWN
Sure, you writing those CASESHEETS and acts you produce are really REDUNDANT
But, let me tell you how it'd be
You won't get with this you see
Cuz you can't handle me

It’s a simple fact that you can’t seem to handle me
No matter how you act with them you can’t handle me
Its just a simple fact that you can’t seem to handle me
Don’t matter how you act with them
you can’t handle me
I don't really feel you got my back
Cuz you’re a selfish narcissistic psycho Freaking bootlicking Nazi pimp and
You can’t handle me

Yeah, I heard about some STUDENT that you beat pretty bad and got in the RUMOURS
Sure, you own a cool JOB and I hear you get far with every NURSES
Yeah, I saw you on the WALL your song is the $H!T but you're outrageous
Sure, I see you’re living' large with your crib and your cars and that's just great,
but Let me tell you how it'd be
You won't get with this you see
Cuz you can't handle me
It’s a simple fact that
you can’t seem to handle me

No matter how you act with them you can’t handle me
It’s a simple fact that you can’t seem to handle me
Don’t matter how you act with them
you can’t handle me
I don't really feel you got my back
Cuz you’re a selfish narcissistic psycho Freaking bootlicking Nazi creep and
You can’t handle me (BECAUSE IN SO MANY WAYS, I AM BETTER THAN YOU!!)

.....AND THEY KNOW IT!

Friday, April 18, 2008

pressure that is not too sweet





Blood Pressure Range

High blood pressure is also known as hypertension. It is measured in mm Hg(millimetres of mercury).

Blood pressure is always given as two numbers- systolic pressure (when the heart beats) and diastolic pressure (when the heart relaxes). When the measurements are written down, both are written one above or before the other with the systolic being the first number. It is measured using an instrument called the spygnomanometer. It can also be measured digitally.

this criteria is according to the BRITISH HYPERTENSION SOCIETY (i made this table for you guys k....)


High Blood Pressure Range:

210 120 Stage 4
180 110 Stage 3
160 100 Stage 2
140 90 Stage 1


Normal Blood Pressure Range:

130 85 High Normal Blood Pressure
120 80 Normal Blood Pressure
110 75 Low Normal Blood Pressure


Low blood pressure level:

90 60 Borderline Low blood Pressure
60 40 Too Low Blood Pressure
50 33 Dangerously Low Blood Pressure


Note:




  • When systolic and diastolic pressure falls into different categories, the higher category should be used to classify the blood pressure level example 160/80 mm Hg would be considered as Stage 2 High Blood Pressure.


  • A blood pressure of 130/80 mmHg would be considered as high blood pressure for people with diabetes or chronic kidney disease.


http://www.medindia.net/patients/patientinfo/diet-high-blood-pressure-range.htm








Normally, your blood glucose levels increase slightly after you eat. This increase causes your pancreas to release insulin so that your blood glucose levels do not get too high. Blood glucose levels that remain high over time can damage your eyes, kidneys, nerves, and blood vessels.




Several different types of blood glucose tests are used.





  • Fasting blood sugar (FBS) measures blood glucose after you have not eaten for at least 8 hours. It often is the first test done to check for diabetes.


  • 2-hour postprandial blood sugar measures blood glucose exactly 2 hours after you eat a meal.


  • Random blood sugar (RBS) measures blood glucose regardless of when you last ate. Several random measurements may be taken throughout the day. Random testing is useful because glucose levels in healthy people do not vary widely throughout the day. Blood glucose levels that vary widely may indicate a problem. This test is also called a casual blood glucose test.


  • Oral glucose tolerance test is used to diagnose prediabetes and diabetes. An oral glucose tolerance test is a series of blood glucose measurements taken after you drink a sweet liquid that contains glucose. This test is commonly used to diagnose diabetes that occurs during pregnancy (gestational diabetes). This test is not commonly used to diagnose diabetes in a person who is not pregnant.




Blood glucose





High values
The American Diabetes Association (ADA) criteria for diagnosing diabetes are met when any of the following results have been repeated on at least two different days:





  • A fasting blood glucose level is 126 mg/dL (7.0 mmol/L) or higher.


  • A 2-hour oral glucose tolerance test result is 200 mg/dL (11.1 mmol/L) or higher.


  • Symptoms of diabetes are present and a random blood glucose test is 200 mg/dL (11.1 mmol/L) or higher. Symptoms of diabetes include increased thirst and frequent urination (especially at night), unexplained increase in appetite, unexplained weight loss, fatigue, erection problems, blurred vision, and tingling or numbness in the hands or feet.


  • If your fasting blood glucose level measures in the range of 100 mg/dL (5.5 mmol/L) to 125 mg/dL (6.9 mmol/L), you are considered to have prediabetes (impaired fasting glucose), and you have an increased chance of getting diabetes.


Low values
A fasting glucose level below 40 mg/dL (2.2 mmol/L) in women or below 50 mg/dL (2.8 mmol/L) in men that is accompanied by symptoms of hypoglycemia may mean you have an insulinoma, a tumor that produces abnormally high amounts of insulin.



http://diabetes.webmd.com/blood-glucose











.....in the end, we all have to have a "balanced diet".....

they are not perfect either.


internationally-renowned physicist STEPHEN HAWKING, who is hailed as one of the most brilliant minds of our time, is disabled with amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS) which has progressively caused him to become almost completely paralysed. although doctors told him he would not live beyond his 20s, stephen turned 66 last january.






Action hero, BRUCE WILLIS has had a stuter since he was a child. he had been worried that it would affect his acting career. by practising and working in his craft, however, he managed to overcome his speech disorder.


MICHAEL J. FOX who is famous for his acting in back to the future, was diagnosed with parkinson's disease in 1991. it is a disorder of the central nervous system resulting in the destruction of brain cells, causing trembling limbs and weakness. despite this, michael continued working as an actor until 2000, when he retired from full-time acting.



Film and TV actor RENE KIRBY, who has spina bifida, has used the condition to his advantage in films like SHALLOW HAL and STUCK ON YOU.


ROWAN ATKINSON had a very bad stutter as a young boy and had problems pronouncing the letter B. by over-enunciating his words, which he then turned into comic element inhis performances.





Actress JESSICA ALBA suffered from obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) as a child, but managed to bring the condition under control as she grew older.





18 year old american surfer BETHANY MEILANI HAMILTON lost her left arm in a shart attack 5 years ago, just 8 weeks after the incident, bethany was back on her board. in 2004, she was given the ESPY award for best comeback athlete of the year and a courage award at the teen choice awards. after teaching herself to surf with one arm, she has returned to competitive surfing.







Elliot Yamin, who was placed 3rd in the 5th AI, is 90% deaf in his right ear, and was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes when he was 16. he wears an insulin pump to help him manage his diabetes.





one of the world's best-selling authors of all time, AGATHA CHRISTIE suffered from dyslexia, a learning difficulty that makes reading and writing a challenge.




ANDREA BOCELLI lost his sight at the age of 12, but this did not stop his passion for music. he plays the piano, saxophone and flute, and is a renowned operatic tenor and classical singer.










the legendary STEVIE WONDER has been blind since infancy. however, he was signed by motown records at the age of 12, and is now one of the most famous singers, songwriters, instrumentalists and record producers in the world



DAVID BECKHAM suffers from OCD which causes him to be obsessed with constant cleanliness and perfection around him. for eg, everything around him has to be in pairs, so if there are 3 items in the table, one has to be removed, or another added.







TIGER WOODS had stuttering problems as a child, and got over it through hard work and persistence. he would even talk to his dog until he fell asleep!






nepalese poet and writer JHAMAK GHIMIRE, 28, has won many awards for her writing, and is one of the leading literary figures in her country. she was born with cerebral palsy, and cannot use her arms, and therefore writes with her feet.









TOM CRUISE was labelled stupid and bullied in school because he had dyslexia. he overcame this by throwing himself into sports and eventually broke into acting









taken from STUFF @ SCHOOL, the STAR